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Big wheel keep on turning

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Talk about a public flogging! Did you tune in to the Jan. 9 SLO County Board of Supervisors meeting?

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Like a Greek Chorus from a Sophoclean Tragedy, members of the public—uniformly aligned with COLAB (the Coalition of Labor, Agriculture, and Business), the local Republican party, or conservative causes—one by one sonorously rebuked 3rd District Supervisor Adam Hill for being a bully, and subsequently encouraged the conservative majority to again pass him over for rotation to board chair.

Hill was called everything from "emotionally unsuitable" to "childish" to an "embarrassment" ... without a hint of irony considering the public speakers' ostensible Orange Overlord scarfing cheeseburgers and belching out cable news-driven tweets from the White House!

My favorite comment, from Nipomo's Terri Stricklin, lamented, "Not only does Mr. Hill bully the general public that come to these meetings, he bullies the media and not just the conservative media. He even bullies the New Times."

It's true! He's been very persnickety to me, though in his defense, I've relentlessly made fun of his foibles. What can I say? I love the man's positions, but he seems to be his own worst enemy. It's like his foot is permanently stuck in his mouth.

Of course, the entire board should be condemned for their immaturity. Other counties manage civil decorum and an ordered rotation of the chair position, but for some reason, our current board acts like a quintet of kindergartners who can't take turns sharing the gavel. What a bunch of dirty-diapered toddlers!

"I don't want to play in this competition of spite and bitterness," Hill wrote in a post-meeting statement, which for one quick second made me think he was all-out resigning before he added he would no longer fight to defend himself but only fight for the "poor," "sick," and "vulnerable," just like Jesus!

Nice try, haters! You crucified Hill in the meeting, but He is risen!

Lucky for me and this column, on Jan. 8, the day before Hill took his high road vow, he lashed out at the organizers of the local Women's March for agreeing to go on Dave "Rush Limbaugh-lite" Congalton's local KVEC 920-radio gab-a-thon on Jan. 12 (5 to 6:30 p.m., in case you're interested).

"Before you enjoy your grotesque love fest on the Dave Congalton show," Hill wrote in an email to Women's March organizers, "please call Dee Torres, who used to be a 'woman leader' in our community until Congalton spent a year spreading malicious lies about her on his show."

Torres, now Hill's wife, was the homeless services coordinator for CAPSLO (Community Action Partnership of SLO County). Hill went on to claim that Congalton made light of domestic violence suffered by Torres in her previous marriage, adding that Congalton had called Torres "fat" on air. He also claimed Congalton, who's married, has a "secret crush" on conservative 4th District Supervisor Lynn Compton.

Man, Adam, I simply can't understand why your behavior is being called childish! It's a real puzzler!

Women's March organizers are simply trying to get some publicity for their very good cause wherever they can get it. If they can connect to some Congalton listeners, more power to them!

I get that you're protective of your wife and that Congalton can be a gasbag, but you don't need to dive into the muck every time you're feeling slighted! Do you want to be compared to Pismo Beach, the only city in SLO County that politely declined an invitation to officially issue a proclamation declaring January Women's March Month?

Maybe Pismo Beach felt above it all. I mean, look, a Washington Post writer recently penned an editorial suggesting Ivy League schools like Princeton should franchise their university to satellite schools, and Pismo would be a great spot! Yes, Pismo Beach, along Price Canyon Road specifically! I can't wait to get my Princeton-Pismo Beach sweatshirt!

"I majored in Bro Studies with concentration in The Big Lebowski. I was going to minor in surfing too, but, you know, I didn't want to, like, spread myself too thin, bro."

Hill claims to have used his office "to continually promote women," which is why he found Women's March organizers' Congalton visit "offensive."

"But don't worry," Hill wrote, "I'm just a big mouth troublemaker."

Wow! You "get" you! You really "get" you! And yet you simply can't shut your mouth and pick your battles. What really chaps my hide is that Hill is on the right side of the issues! He really does care about the poor, the homeless, and the marginalized, but if he wants to effectively help them, he needs to stay in office. To do that, he needs public support.

Where were all the liberal public commenters lining up to praise Hill and encourage the SLO County Board of Supervisors to follow decorum and an ordered rotation and allow Hill his rightful turn as board chair? Where? Oh yeah, they stayed home. Why? Because unlike conservatives who seem to have an endless appetite to apologize for Prez Donald "Stable Genius" Trump, liberals can't defend Hill's bad behavior.

Hill is a tenacious politician, a fighter, and a tiger! But like a tiger, I fear he can't change his stripes. Δ

The Shredder ... sigh. Send ideas and comments to shredder@newtimesslo.com.


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