Opinion » Shredder

Fake outrage


Should you read this? It might be fake news. If only someone would convene a panel of experts, maybe call it "Fake News Panel: What is it, and who decides?" It could be held at Cal Poly on Feb. 13. The various co-sponsors could invite whoever they think best represents their views, and then let them all go at it in a steel cage death match of ideas!

Well, that actually almost happened, but then the Cal Poly College Republicans chose conservative blogger and overt racist Bill Whittle to appear. Whittle, who's definitely some kind of "stable genius," believes Black Lives Matter is a terrorist organization run by intellectually inferior black people. Oh, and Islam is at war with everybody. Oh yeah, he also believes races can be divided between "civilized man" and "barbarian."

Sadly and predictably, Cal Poly College Democrats subsequently withdrew, basically because they argued that allowing Whittle to appear would promote racism and hate speech.

Hey, there's no question Whittle's a small-minded bigot, and like disgraced right-wing provocateur Milo Yiannopoulos' Jan. 31, 2017, appearance on campus, choosing Whittle seemed to be more about the College Republicans courting controversy and shock value rather than wanting to engage in a good-faith, intellectual discussion about "fake news." I mean, unless they think a racist piece of shit like Whittle best represents their views. Hello? Really, guys?

Of course, that's beside the point. The real question is what are liberals afraid of? Can't their ideas go head-to-head with a guy who believes races, not individual people, can be ranked by their IQs?

Whittle, proving he's at least not an anti-Semite, says Ashkenazi Jews have a 115 IQ followed by East Asians, Koreans, Chinese, and Japanese who "clock in at 105, 106," followed by Caucasians at about 100, then Hispanics around 90, then American blacks as 85, "partly because they have 20 percent European mixture in their gene pool," then sub-Saharan Africans around 70 IQ, and last and definitely least Australian aboriginals "clocking in around 67 or whatever."

Come on, snowflakes! Let him talk, take him to the mat, and then get to the actual point, which is that "fake news" is a term cooked up by a demagogue to fool his followers who look white but might be Whittle's Australian aboriginals, judging from their critical thinking skills.

If I was on the panel (No invite! Weird, right?), I'd begin by explaining that President Trumplethinskin believes that news he doesn't like is "fake." Trump's followers—essentially anti-intellectual knuckle-draggers hiding behind a twisted and judgmental version of Jesus Christ's message of love, tolerance, and acceptance—worship Trump because he readily offers up scapegoats for them. Despite Trump's proven racism, sexism, and infidelity, his so-called "Christian" followers forgive him, while condemning those he unfairly vilifies.

Can you handle the truth? Most demonstrably, "fake news" comes from right-wing conservatives!

The story of liberal Judge Marc Kelly, who reduced pedophile Kevin Jonas Rojano-Nieto's prison term because he claimed his 3-year-old victim "asked" to be raped, was generated by Your News Wire, even though it was totally false.

The story of Black Lives Matter leader Marquesha Johnson being sued for donation embezzlement? Totally fake! It was first published on the "satirical" site reaganwasright.com and then picked up as fact by other right-wing news sites including mediaconservative.com and conservativestand.com.

Ever since U.S. Rep. Adam Schiff (D-Calif.) penned the so-far-unreleased rebuttal to House Intelligence Committee Chairman Devin Nunes' Trump/Russia investigation memo claiming that the FBI had improperly surveilled Trump campaign advisor Carter Page, Schiff has become the target of far-right fake news attacks. For instance, the claim that his sister Melissa was married to philanthropist George Soros' son Robert—proving to the right-wing fever swamp that some sort of globalist conspiratorial cabal is at work. Guess what? It's true. A Melissa Robin Schiff did marry Robert Soros, but she's no relation to Adam.

I could go on and on, but speaking of Nunes—or as The Fresno Bee calls him, "Trump's stooge"—he has his own news site called The California Republican (carepublican.com), which carries pithy little blurbs like this: "Dem CA Rep roasted on CNN, proceeds to make a fool of himself," referencing outspoken Trump critic and fellow California Rep. Ted Lieu. Sounds like a totally legit, unbiased news source, amirite?

Well, after Cal Poly's whiny College Democrats pulled out, followed by several other scheduled participants, the panel quickly fell apart, but journalism to the rescue! Well, almost.

The Cal Poly Journalism Department—a co-sponsor of the original event—tried to reconstitute the event.

But on the day of the event, Journalism Department chair Mary Glick announced that the new-and-improved event was canceled, again. WTF guys? How many times is this fake news forum going to be fake news?!

I guess we'll see in October, when the Journalism Department tries again, or whenever the College Republicans decides to run its own fake news panel. Maybe they'll bring back Yiannopoulos, a "victim of the fake news media," according to a club statement.

"Stay tuned!" they said.

I'm definitely tuning out. Δ

The Shredder is way smarter than Ashkenazi Jews. Send ideas and comments to shredder@newtimesslo.com.


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