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Headlines from 2125 A.D.

All the future news that's fit to print in the present

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The residents of Los Osos, Calif., may now breathe a sigh of relief. After centuries of delays, litigation, and numerous votes, the residents were to begin the first stage of design for the long-awaited waste sewage system. This new system is purported to cost each residence $3.5 million. This, however, will not be the case since the introduction of the newly patented waste vaporizing plumbing system. Now, at a cost of $15,000 for each residence, Los Osos as well as other cities will be able to demolish existing sewer treatment plants. Los Osos is expected to call for a city vote for this new system by year 2130. Litigation is now pending for a stay of the required design for the waste sewage system.

On another note, Ernest Dalidio the 27th will now be allowed to build only a fruit stand (no larger that 15 feet by 25 feet) on the Dalidio property. The Dalidio family will be required to build the freeway overpass connection to Prado Road, as well as contribute $15 billion to save the Los Osos sewer system. The county vote was very close: 3,347,245 to 3,347,265 in favor. Although a review of the voting will take place, the vote is expected to stand. There were some rumblings that the ghost of Ernie Dalidio cast seven votes himself.

In Arroyo Grande, John Ferber was allowed to paint his living room with the approved city color. The painting is expected to begin in 2126 when his Living Room Painting Allotment number is allocated. The Living Room Painting Fee was $12,345 dollars. The county vote for his approval was 3,245,657 to 3,234,566 for approval.

In Atascadero, Mary Smythe was not allowed to add an additional bathroom to her three bedrooms, one bath residence. After 14 years of litigation, three elections, two initiatives, and four petitions, the United States Supreme Court denied her appeal.

As you recall, more than a century ago back in 2008 an initiative was passed that required the San Luis Obispo County voters to decide any and every improvement on all properties. This was the result of the many litigations surrounding the Dalidio property.

Now folks, I am all for giving a thorough look and questioning what we do to the land. But aren't some people being a little silly and, in some cases, downright mean to the extreme? One should ask: Did I oppose the parking garages in San Luis Obispo, yet I park there? Did I oppose Home Depot and Costco, yet I shop there? Only you know and only you should be fair and, most importantly, reasonable. Forgo those ultraistic hidden agendas and ulterior motives. Look at what we do with the land in a fair, responsible, and reasonable manner. There should be no "I've had mine, you can't have yours" attitude. One should not be negative just to be negative. One should not oppose just to oppose. One should not be an activist just to be an activist. Not that the land is unimportant it is very important but there are so many more important things that should be improved (healthcare, education) and resisted (poverty, famine, genocide, corruption, and unreasonable, unsubstantiated wars). I believe those should be top on the list for activists.

Remember, we all need an affordable place to live, work, and shop. We should all practice a little TLCC and that is tolerance, love, compassion, and compromise. Plus, we all need to just get along.

James A. Crawford is a San Luis Obispo resident.

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