Otis Page's recurring rants are becoming so predictable that we feel he must use a template so that he can knock them out quickly, sort of like the Mad Libs of our youth, only even more illogical (see his most-recent letter, "Democrat candidates have a lot to consider," in the April 19 New Times). We have "stumbled" upon Otis' template and would like to share it with New Times readers.

This week's commentary didn't translate well to the web. Be sure to pick it up in New Times, available throughout San Luis Obispo County.

Patrick Mallon and Jim Mallon live in San Luis Obispo. New Times Editor Ryan Miller has a sneaking suspicion that they made this template up themselves.

-- Jim Mallon - San Luis Obispo